Long forgotten blog

Where are all my blood brothers?

Just wondering will any of my brothers see this again?

We have a blog that is long forgotten.

Let's revive this blog!

久违了的博客

看到如此惨景，心里只闪过一句：寻寻觅觅，冷冷清清，凄凄惨惨戚戚。

Oh my god, 好凄凉的一幕啊，怎么过一整年了只有328的一个 update?! Walau, 你们这一年都干了什么来着？~_~ Come on man, update me on your recent endeavours~! Post 些照片或有趣的pics 都 ok啊，不要让我们的 blog 被冰封啊~

Cool & funky 3D ID!!!~ Try it out Pals... :P

Yoz Bros,

Had a little time to spare amidst my hectic schedule these few weeks so i thought i might well update this 'dead' blog once lol~ I was surfing ard & chanced upon this kinda cool website... do try it out. Create ur own personal 3D identity character for use on profiles, blogs, websites etc... itz in the form of an animation GIF image file thus itz pretty handy. Anyway, sorry bear & yyj, couldn't join u peeps for bball... I'll rally u guys when i'm free k, paiseh~

Oh yeah, b4 i forget... here's the web add:

http://www.meez.com/home.dm

ENJOY!!!~ Hahaha... :P

Tough days ahead, have a good laugh for the moment :)

Mid-terms & mock exams are just around the corner, stress sia. Here's some nitty gritties to relieve yourself a bit :P

To those who can't take dirty jokes, pls do not read on.
No joke no fun!

4 miracles of a woman:>>
(i) getting wet without taking a shower
(ii) bleeding without getting hurt
(iii) giving milk without eating grass
(iv) and making boneless flesh hard

A man bumps into a woman at a hotel and says "So sorry ma'am. If your heart is as soft as your breasts, you will forgive me." The lady replies, "If your dick is as hard as your elbow, I am in room 603."

Q : How do the Talibans seduce their women?
A : First they attack their twin towers, then they crash into their pentagon.

Girls' reactions to various dick sizes:
9" - oh shit pain!
7" - oh yes, yum!
6" - oh perfect!
5" - mmm ok!
4" - push more
3" - is it in?
2" - idiot! Just use your tongue!

Ever wondered why ABCDEF are used to define bra sizes?
A - Airport (flat)
B - Barely there
C - Can do
D - Damn good
E - Enormous
F - Fake

During pregnancy:
The 1st three months, do it the normal style.
Next three months do it the doggy style.
And the last three months do it the wolf style. Sit outside the hole and howl.

Latest statistics on 'what men do after SEX'?
2% eat
3% smoke cigarettes
4% take a shower
5% go to sleep
86% get up and go back home to their wife
HOW TRUE!!!

What did Newton's dick say to him after seeing a nude woman?
"Fuck you and your law of gravity, I'm going UP."

Man was sobbing in a bar. His friend asked 'why?'
He said: "my wife makes me pay $ 100/- for every Fuck. Friend said: "you're lucky, she charges others $250/-"

Lady scolds her maid for inefficiency.
Angry maid: "At least I am better than you in bed."
Lady (amazed): "Did boss tell you this?"
Maid: "No, the driver did."

What is the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
" After a year, the dog is still excited to see you."

A wife complains to the doctor that her hubby is 300% impotent. The doc asks "how 300%?" She says: "you know about the 100%, and now he has broken his finger and burnt his tongue."

Teacher: "why buffaloes get depressed after milking?"
Student: "Ma'am, if your boobs are rubbed for 2 hours and you are left unfucked how would you feel?"

Policeman arrested a prostitute.
Prostitute: "I'm not selling sex!"
Policeman: "Then what are you doing?"
Prostitute: "I'm selling condoms and offering free demo."

A female reporter was interviewing a farmer regarding mad cow disease.
Reporter: Sir, would you like to comment about the mad cow disease?
Farmer: Lady, do you know that bulls and cows only have sex once a year?
Reporter: Sir, I respect your comment but we are talking about mad cow disease.
F armer: Lady, and do you know that we squeeze cow's breast six times a day.
Reporter: Sir, but what is it got to do with mad cow disease.
Farmer: If your boyfriend squeeze your breast six times a day, but only have SEX once in a year, WILL YOU BE MAD?

8 steps to get a girl's number!

Yo bros~ Let me teach you a technique to "cheat" a girl into giving you her tel number :P

All you need is: ONE CALCULATOR~
Pass the calculator to her and ask her to follow the instructions below (convince her you won't peep into the calculator while she's executing the instructions):

Step 1: Ask the girl to key in the first 4 digits of her hp number.

Step 2: Tell her to multiply the 4 digit number by 80.

Step 3: Add 1 to the result.

Step 4: Multiply the new result by 250.

Step 5: Ask her to add the last 4 digits of her hp number to the result in step 4.

Step 6: Get her to add the last 4 digits of her hp number to the newest result again.

Step 7: Minus 250 from the final result.

Step 8: Get the calculator from her. Divide the value shown on the calculator by 2.

Tada~ You'll get her hp number~~!
Don't forget to gimme a treat for every girl that you manage to cheat, heh~


Courtesy of Nel~

吾绪 II

无言到面前, 与汝分杯水.
清中有浓意, 流出心底醉.
不论冤或缘, 默说蝴蝶梦.
还你此生此世, 今世前世,
双双飞过万世千生去...

哀哉...

吾绪

在那么有限的生命中,
能被所爱的人深深爱过,
或许不该再奢求, 再怨什么.
世上的遗憾本来就很多,
在艰难的说了再见后,
你真的不该再紧紧抱我.
刚才还能体谅的放开你的手,
不代表我就够坚强洒脱.

我们曾有过一次幸福的机会,
当玫瑰和诺言还没枯萎.
别说抱歉, 我不后悔,
曾经逆风和你一起飞.
我们曾有过一次幸福的机会,
似乎就要拥有爱的完美.
我说别哭, 你说不哭,
然后我们都流下了眼泪.

You know your shit?

读完之后真的是笑到哭... 与大伙儿分享 :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

關於大號的印象，大多數的人也許都讓他隨著馬桶的沖水聲而一去不復返，不過，經過仔細的比較、分析，我們每個人每天所產出的軟黃金，其實還蠻有學問的哦！我們就依其特性，先稍微將產出物做一番分類！

幽靈屎： 就是你已經感覺大出來，但在馬桶內找不到屎的那種。

清白屎：就是你把他大出來，看見他在馬桶內，但卻在衛生紙上找不到 痕跡的那種。

濡濕屎：就是你擦屁股五十次之後，仍舊感覺沒擦過一樣，因此，你得在你的屁股和內褲之間墊上一些衛生紙，免得褲子被沾污的那種。

續攤屎：通常發生在大完之後，把褲子拉上時，你發現還得再多大一些的那一種。

額頭青筋暴裂屎：撇條撇得十分辛苦，你幾乎用力得擠到血管脹破才能暢通的那種。

如釋重負屎：就是數量多到大完後體重減輕五公斤的那種。

豪華加長屎：如此巨大壯觀，你擔心若不先用馬桶刷把他弄碎，可能會沖不掉的那種。

氣泡屎：瓦斯含量較高，排出時產生巨大聲響，聽到的人都忍不住偷笑的那種。

玉米粒屎：一目了然，吃了什麼東西都可以看得一清二楚的那種。

老天，真希望我可以大出來之屎：就是你很想大出來，但所有你能做的只有坐在馬桶上抽幾回筋，放幾個空包彈的那種。

骨刺屎：就是大出來的時候，痛得讓你發誓他是橫著出來的那種。

賤臀屎：就是飛快的從屁股脫出後，會濺起大量的水花再臀部的那種。

液態屎：黃棕色液體，射出後灑滿整個馬桶的那種。

墨西哥料理屎：他的味道如此難聞，以致於房子得拆掉重建。

上等屎：那種自視甚高，以為別人聞起來沒味道的。

漂浮屎：就是當你在公共廁所，外面已經等了兩個人，而你已沖水兩次，卻還有幾粒高爾夫球大小的浮在水面上的那種。

醬料屎：這種情形從來不發生在家裡，通常發生在晚會或重要會議，原本只是想放個小屁，但卻演變成褲底的”蕃茄醬　”，使得你接下來的時間都得腳開開，用Ｏ型腿走路的那種。

香檳屎：就是當那塊使你便秘已久的”軟木塞　”，波～～的一聲離開之後，會有泡泡狀的液柱流出屁眼的那種。

自投羅網屎：就是當你才要去擦他，他已經迫不及待的掉在你手中衛生紙的那種（噁）。

爆破屎：就是在一個震撼性的屁響之後，你必須檢查馬桶是否有破裂的那種。

驅魔者屎：黃棕色的液體從你屁眼射出後，灑得到處都是，而屁眼有灼熱感，令人想起電影”鬼哭神號　”裡面那個嘔吐的小女孩。

躲貓貓屎：大到一半他縮回去～然後伸出來～縮回去，一直持續下去。

懷孕屎：就是你已經靠著背，呻吟喘息了好一陣子，最後終於從臀縫中誕生的那種。

以上這些分類，相信已經夠包羅萬象，天下之屎，莫過於此，要不要比對一下，你今天大的，屬於那一類型 ?

A few things to say

October, feels like a long month. Alotta things happened, and my emotions are analogous to a sinusoidal curve. A few implications when October ends:

1. Deepavali & Hari Raya are near
2. Most of us are 21!!! AH!!! (except for 328 => cannot watch RA movie officially :P)
3. Exams are near! AH!!!!!!
4. Holidays are also near! Yay!!! (But then again, hols only one month, then the vicious cycle in NUS begins again, AH!!!!!!!!!)
5. IPPT window is opened... At my present condition, I shiver to think of what would happen if I were to take it now... (This means more gym during the hols! Mo to! Mo to! Ha ya ku!) Dammit, I want the $$$!

Now that we've officially reached adulthood, I guess it is time we seriously considered about our future. I hate to use these words, but sometimes I feel we've been quite 吊儿郎当, should really curb on the vice activities that we engage in, hehe. Of course it's ok to indulge in ourselves once in a while, but I think we should go into healthier and more economically viable activities :P. I always believe that life can only get better, but at the current state, I feel stagnant, and in fact, getting more 颓废, no good... Let's work hard now so that we can lead the kind of lives we want in the future yah~ Gambate!

Those who don't work hard, better watch it!

*The featured characters are professional models who are adept at poses with violent implications, children at home should not imitate*

All my good old buddies.

Hi guys suprised to see me blogging? You guys must be enjoying the dance, the drink and the girls right? Hey guys sorry to pang sei you guys yesterday. I am very busy this month. Just this week, i was busy preparing for my Div change of Com. Then at the same time someone in my camp passed away. Plus i am working a camp job on sunday. So i am really busy with work and not that i pei sophia then forget you guys hor. You guys are equally important to me. All my die hard buddies. Ok i will try to make up the next time k. Treat you guys drink k.

Oi ya just to inform you guys that i will be going to chiang mai from 16 -18 this month. Going there to get some products tell you guys more when i see you all. And then 19 - 22 will be going to Genting with my family. so JACKY DONT SAY I NEVER SAY HOR!

Btw, YJ and NEl you guys celebrating your birthday bor?? ok going to end of here...You guys take care and study hard. Dont drink too much because alcohol make you go STUPIG.